The 5 Pillars For Influencing Others
You must absolutely focus on these 5 pillars.
Influencing others is a skill that everyone would like to have. From the sales representative who could make better sales to the founder of a startup who could raise more funds, to individuals who would like to convince people around them to take action more easily.
However, while many people would like to be able to really influence others, very few people really do. And I think the problem comes from the approach taken by these people. In order to influence others, there are 5 pillars on which you need to focus. These 5 pillars concern your attitude and behavior towards others.
After reading these 5 pillars, you will therefore understand that before you can influence others, you will really have to work on yourself.
1. Empathy
Empathy is an essential personality trait if you want to be able to influence others. And I am talking here about true empathy not of the one who is faked because the latter never lasts very long and therefore does not work.
An empathetic person will be able to recognize and understand the feelings and emotions of others.
By being able to understand how a person feels, you will be able to know what they need.
This will make it easier for you to point it in one direction or another. Since what you are about to offer corresponds to something he or she expects, this person will more naturally follow your advice and you will be able to influence them without any particular effort to make.
2. Humility
Being humble allows you to see yourself realistically. You are aware of your strengths but also of your weaknesses. In fact, you know perfectly well that you can be improved in many areas. This will be felt positively in your interactions with other people as they will feel that you are in demand to learn from their experiences.
Whoever is ready to put himself in the student’s position in front of others will find it easier to gain their trust.
For that, there is no secret, you must be truly humble. Your contacts will feel more confident with you and they will be more inclined to listen to you afterward when you give them advice.
This will greatly enhance your ability to influence others.
3. Authenticity
You cannot influence others in a sustainable way without being truly authentic. This means that you must be yourself with others even if the positions you express may shock or surprise you.
In the short term, this can play tricks on you. Nevertheless, over time, authentic people are very often praised by others. Their integrity and the consistency of their positions are highly appreciated.
With someone who is authentic, you will always know where you stand in life.
Others will know that you are saying what you think and that they can trust you. By gaining the trust of others, you are much more likely to have your advice followed. Your ability to influence therefore requires that you be authentic no matter what happens.
4. Honesty
Being authentic in your relationships with others will make it easier for you to be honest. Being honest will consist of giving your opinion to others without lies. In some cases, this may be annoying, but never forget the following:
In order to influence someone, you should never hesitate to tell them what they need to hear and not just what they want to hear.
Maybe the person in front of you is not ready to hear certain things. Nevertheless, you would not be doing him any favors by comforting him in his position if you think this person is wrong.
People will necessarily start opening their eyes one day. Once the awareness is achieved, a person with whom you have been honest on an important issue will thank you for it. You will naturally gain his trust and this person will tend to listen to you eagerly in the future.
Indeed, people who say things with honesty are rare and it is therefore essential to know how to surround yourself with them.
5. Be Measured
In life, whatever the situation you are going to face, you will have to be measured. So, when someone complains aggressively to you, you will need to have the ability to step back and put yourself in their shoes for a moment.
Having developed your sense of empathy will help you do that.
By taking a step back, you will be able to analyze situations from the perspective of others.
This will help you better understand why they do some things. In fact, you will be able to calm them down more easily and avoid conflicts. By avoiding conflicts, you will appear to be a wise person to whom people can come and express their complaints in complete confidence.
Everything you say afterward will naturally be much more listened to and followed up because it will appear to others as a potential solution to their problems.
Conclusion
Influencing others is first and foremost about working on yourself. You will have to develop 5 personality traits that constitute the 5 pillars of influencing others.
This work on yourself will make it easier for you to gain the trust of others because you will be the one who is honest and who really understands others while keeping calm in all situations.
So when you give your opinion or advice to someone, they will most likely listen to you and do what you say. As you can imagine, all this is not done in a day, but it is really worth it.
Some reading
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